Monday, July 25, 2011

Father and Son

inspired by a true story and a post by Migs on July 18, 2007

Rob slowly opened the door. For the first time in his life he noticed their door, which he entered and exited for countless times since he was able to walk, creaked. The sound was like small silver pins painfully stabbing him all over. He slowly pushed the metal handle and locked the door behind him.

Inside, he can see his father standing in front of the living room window inanimately staring outside. He expected this after the event that happened early that morning which involves him, his dad and his best friend, Ash.

He knows this stance. It's an ominous prelude to a very painful realization between him and his dad and he has seen this event happened before though very rare. He never wanted this scene raised from the depths of his memories much more played again in real life.

Rob is the younger of two sons. All through the efforts of his loving parents, he grew up to be a responsible, intelligent and more often than not, obedient young man which amazingly matches his subtle good looks and tall, muscular frame. He is the near perfect child that every parent wishes... take note: near perfect. 

Early that morning, his father saw him and his best friend Ash at the lobby of the building were Ash is working as they affectionately kissed and hugged each other good bye followed by a heartfelt “I love you”. He didn't care much on who’s there or who’s watching them until his dad unexpectedly showed up. There they were on a busy lobby staring at each other for what seems like hours… on one side, him and his “best friend” on the other, his dad.

The creaking of the door was followed by a deafening silence. The light of a passing car pierced through the window pane illuminating the unexpressive face of his father. It breaks Rob’s heart to see his dad this way.

Rob dragged himself from the closed door to the sofa. He knew that every step towards his waiting dad was a step closer to the affirmation of the thing that he had kept for so long. This was the moment he promised to Ash. He promised that when the time comes, he would defend and fight for their relationship. He tried to show a strong front for his dad though inside, he is scared like hell.

He quietly sat on the leather sofa. His dad didn’t move an inch. He waited for his dad to do the first move but it didn’t happen. He couldn’t bear the silence and the coldness between them so Rob started to speak first.

“We’ve been together since I introduced him to you as my best friend.” He said. “I love him.”

He was waiting for his dad to respond. Again, his dad didn’t move an inch.

“I’m sorry dad. Believe me, I tried not to be like this.” Rob continued only this time he’s strong and firm front is now tainted with a subtle pain. “I didn’t tell you because I’m afraid that you might not love me anymore… I’m sorry dad if I fail you.”  

Rob was concentrating hard on the things he is saying while holding back his tears that he didn’t realize that his dad was already in front of him. He gently held his son’s hand and looked in his eyes and spoke for the first time.

“Son, there are four things I cannot decide for you, even if I wanted to." His father said. It was soft but it has a quiet power that you would be gently forced to listen too. "First, your political affiliation. You decide the political principles you believe in, and your idea of how society should be organized. Second, your religious convictions. I raised you up as a Catholic but if you ever so decide to be something else — a Moslem, a Protestant, whatever — then you should follow your conscience, not me. Third, your career. Your career is the one that will make you get out of bed excited as you wake up, and get you going day in, and day out. It will be such a waste of life if you choose to make a career out of other people’s fancies." And then his father hold his hand with firm kindness and warm understanding. "Last my son, your choice of life partner. You will be the one to love and live with that person, so it is really your decision to make. May it be a girl or a guy, son, you will decide for yourself. There is just one thing I want you to promise me, son: that whatever your decision may be, that you will be happy."

With his dad’s last words, Rob’s defenses started to fail. But what made his strong front wall crumble to dust were his dad’s next gestures.

His father casually leaned over and hugged him, his heart calmly beating against the fast thumping of his son's. It's as if his more experienced full of wisdom heart is speaking to his son's confused and scared one.

And with one deep breath, his dad ended the night with the following words...

"…and never think that just because you're gay, I would love you any less."

And with that, Rob's defenses crumbled down just as the slivers of tears started falling from his eyes.

No comments:

Post a Comment